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February 19, 2006:    Real Love

I’ve decided there is a pattern of what only a lover could love. Below is a partial list. If you find some of yourself on this list and you are indeed feeling loved by your partner, rejoice! Be thrilled at your good fortune for having chosen a lover-for-life, one that heard those vows! Boomers, and young people, read below and ask yourselves these things, sooner rather than later. I know there is love enough to go around. It is our right and our need to have it, and to give it. Do you love your lover enough?

Here is what I see as what constitutes what only a real lover could love:

- Newly balding heads on men or women.
- Forgetting, for some women, to rid your face of that mustache for a day or so.
- Gaining over 20 lbs., and your S.O. still adoring you.
- Telling your boss to go to hell and your S.O. yelling "Hooray!" with you!
- The "beer belly" looks on a former body builder.
- A flabby upper arm look on a former "stacked," woman!
- Terribly BAD multi-colored hair dye upon one's head.
- You tell your S.O. to go F*ck himself when you are in the middle of a store AND a hot flash, and he asks: "Are you alright, honey?"
- When you don't answer your cell phone, your S.O. sill worries.
- You can wake up, not comb your hair, not change clothes and not wash your face and your S.O. kisses you good-bye when they have to leave.
- If you are a woman and he will STILL carry your purse, anytime, for any reason.
- If you get bunions that are obnoxious and your lover still plays with your toes with his/hers.
- If you can go out with shorts on after 30 and he/she still treats you with respect, holds your hand, and smiles at you in public.
- If you need a partial or God forbid, dentures and your lover is still in love, no matter IF you are wearing them!
- When your veins are finally popping on your legs, male or female and your sex life is the same as it always was, that is, healthy.
- If you can still go anywhere and you never have to look to see where his/her eyes are straying.
- If he/she still has the same hobby.
- If you have gone up two or more sizes in clothes, and better yet, if he/she STILL wants to go shopping with you!
- If your lover is still slightly jealous.
- If any "young thang," can hang his/her "young thangs," in front of him/her and they will look away, AND, move away from the offensive person.
- If when you are out shopping, he/her, keeps his conversations limited with sales people and looks at you, even if you try on 100 items
- If your lovers eyes still reflect back to you how you looked the day you met and you have to remind yourself how old you both are now.
- If your lover has forgotten your age.

So many more! These tell us we are loved. They mean more than any bouquet, any dinner and any vacation. I dare say, are indications so strong of love that we will fall in love AGAIN, if we can know most are true of our lovers.

I submit that if our lovers do not love us to this extent, we are missing a lot. We need to find this sort of love, and we need to know it exists! In a plastic world of people plumping, via injections and Viagra, and preening, we need to know we can be ourselves and be loved! Anything else is conditional. Anything else is surface and anything else is not what we need.

So, ask yourself, does he/she…?