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February 27, 2006:    Cocky vs. Funky

Today I met and worked with some "advanced dancers." This means that these dancers are, using one as an example, trying out for things like the Alvin Alley Dance Company. I need to "put some stuff on them," and check then out, but they were checkin' me out too, trust me.

First, I get cocky, meaning they are cocky. I expect this. Until my name climbs again, which it just did, I may have to take on some young people and show them things. This was what I did today. I auditioned the top of the dancers in one area and they, in a way, are auditioning me.

So, cocky, they are cocky. They are "ready for anything," "lay it on me, lady."

I am funky, even in Ballet. I am naturally funky. I don't take life too seriously or dance, or theater like some folk. I look at it this way: If you can do it, it will show, right there, right now, so why put on airs? If one puts on airs, and one cannot deliver, one is embarrassed, no? So-I don't put on airs. I have fabulous credits but I don't ride on them because who knows? A dancer/choreographer could come along and kick my a** any day right? I know this because I kick dancers butt's every time I work!

I took these cocky folk; one was a dance teacher who thought I would not let her in my class for fear of her stealing moves into the studio. She asked to take my warm up. I knew the gig and invited her to take the whole class! Why not? She was a bit shocked, but tried to maintain her proud face. My face? My face was my dance face, no emotion. I make my own botox!

And so I take these cocky folk thought about 45 min. of warm up, skills and then give them about 32 counts of dance. Ballet, Jazz and Funk. They are lovin' life. They are looking at each other. They are challenged and I am saying "No! You CAN do this!" I am their cheerleader because they need one. I am something they have never seen. I am good. I am not egotistical, and surprise! I am not mean or arrogant! I WANT them to be successful! I want my number to come off right! I don't care who they are, if they want to learn a few counts from me, I want them to be able to do them and do them right WHILE having fun and keeping self-esteem.

They were cocky. Afterwards, they were fans. The teacher was asking if she could take class from me. The younger "stars," were giving me due respect and wide eyed. But, more importantly to me, they were successful! Through my guidance, they did the counts with accuracy, and some grace! No, they did not mirror me. That's okay because I am a Master dancer, which means I have a STYLE that is unique. But the poor dancers had to back up and speak to me differently. The girls had to grin and grin and put their "nice faces," on. The guys had to quickly respect me and do what ever they could to get in my good graces.

Out of this, I got a grant. But…here lies the problem with art such as this:

I didn't change one bit after that, I was still funky, and I still had that "no face, ballet face,"

And I referred them to who is managing me for answers to their questions about working in this or that of my shows. I slipped out to relax.

Another day, another day in my world which is like no one else's. So, I never take myself too seriously. If I did, I don't know who I would be! I would loose myself if I put on airs. No one understands this. Where is my ego? My ego is where it should be. My ego is in the fact that those dancers were successful, happy and felt good about them. I was a part of that. What's more, they were all of the above, AFTER they started with cocky.