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May 18, 2006 :   My skirt, her skirt, and your skirt: Hem Lengths, and the rules?

What are the rules? What length should my hem length be?

What should I wear? What CAN I wear according to societies mores? What is the matter with any length?

An example hit me SMACK in the face at the University of Arizona, Dunkin Donuts and Urban Outfitters, it was an outrage.

I popped into a clothing store drinking my Dunkin Donuts coffee. It had a sale, and that does not bring me in, but it was a boutique, there were clothes and that is a large part of me and what I do, so, in I go… I was wearing a skirt, at "my length," the one that suits my thin dancer's legs, and me which is above the knee by a few inches. I think of it as "long enough to be a "Mom," which I am, and short enough to show my legs at their best, too long makes me disappear and too short, well, makes me compete with children!

There was an interesting skirt. Here, in Arizona, where I am now, denim is a MUST, and you HAVE to have it or you are just "no one," or from out of state, which is worse. Since I am a native of Tucson, and of CA, I have denim in many forms. The skirt was long to my ankles, but ok, because it was stretch denim so therefore, tight enough to show I have a body underneath a lot of fabric. I had to try it on, of course! This was AFTER I held up a trendy pair of sandals that had an old Louis Vuitton pattern, and said to the sales-GIRL, "knock off?" To which she replied, "Yeah." I said, "for shame!"

The skirt fit like a dream. It made the old saying about me true: Put her in anything that stretches and goes around her body and it will work. It had a slit, the slit ran up to about the place where I wear a short skirt, above my knees and not TOO high up. I liked it. Low waisted, comfy, stretchy, but loose enough on me that I could breathe as in a yoga exercise. I was not going to let it get away, of course, so I kept it on, had the girl wrap up my other skirt and walked right out in it!

When I got to the street, and a busy University street it was, leading right into the "Main Gate," of the campus, I felt the "eyes." The "eyes," were sharp and on my butt. I asked my companion, "Is it the butt?" To which he replied, "Of course!" I asked the famous woman’s question, "Does my butt look alright?" (Dancers will ask this of anyone, we are fearless.) He replied, "Yes, that IS the problem!" So, I asked one more question because THIS person will tell me the truth: "Is it rude?" He said ‘No!" Enough information, so on I went into Urban Outfitters. It was then I saw her.

I saw an older couple. That means, older than us. They were gray and probably grandparents of a student. The year had ended and many young people were going home. She wore a skirt, as short as shorts, it was about 5 inches from her butt. She looked fine, and she looked presentable. Certainly, she and her husband looked very nice and dressed just exactly like one would expect. Her hemline, however, was much shorter than my usual short hemline! Her legs were fine, they showed the efforts in life that woman can make, legs with some visible veins and some bulging, but not so much that she should not have worn the skirt. Why could SHE wear that length while endlessly I am told that "no," that will get you killed," or "no, I wouldn’t." Sales people who know, those who are buyers and owners, tell me this and I’m told it by my husband and my friends. "That is not safe for you." When I put on that length of skirt, even I feel like it is too short and therefore, too sexy.

So, why must I suffer and not wear some nice, shorter skirts and shorts? I started to face this question for the first time, this day. I am younger than that woman was so it is not a matter of age. I do not have bad legs so it is not that I would be ugly. She got away with it without looking at ALL like she was trying to be younger than she was. Why can’t I? Does this make sense?

I asked my husband.

He said, "You can put out a saucer of milk and attract some cats or you can put out a saucer of cream and attract all the strays in town!" Regardless of what a woman wears, some woman are cream." He said I am cream, and some are not. "It’s more than just looks, it’s personality, it’s having a magnetic personality, it’s the way a woman walks and talks."

When I was born, (and this is true,) the nurses told my father, "THAT is a "sexy baby." What in the hell does that mean? My father told me that he had the same thought the thought of "what the hell does that mean?"

My husband said that I attract many people to me. But what does this have to do with a skirt and its length?

I am still wondering. I get attitude when I wear that length; I get stares of evil. I get smiles from less than desirable men, and I get, finally, rid of the skirt! Not fair!

What is happening here? I actually thought about this for days and days, and guess what? There IS no answer, none but bigotry. Period. It is bigotry.

Annalisa

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